I pass the same scenes every day as I commute to and from work. On the way into work I leave the suburbs behind and, as the parks fade into the distance, the view out the window of the train becomes one of industry and then one of decay as long closed factories are vandalized and ravaged by time and the elements.

Abandoned but still standingI can’t put my finger on it but there is something mysterious, forbidden, and yes, beautiful about those mere shells of buildings. I’ve often commented that I’d like to take pictures in those buildings, capturing the strange and unique ways the light shines through the broken windows.

In spite of all these buildings have been through, in spite of the neglect and abuse, they’re still standing, unconcerned with their stature, or the way some people perceive them. For all the people who see blight there are some who recognize the strength within their core.

 

This post was originally part of a challenge I did called the 30 Days of Muchness. An amazingly powerful exercise in finding joy, strength, and peace in the things we often take for granted each day. Findingmymuchness.com was started by Tova Gold after a devastating loss when it was difficult to believe there was any joy at all in life. Knowing Tova, who I met after starting the 30 day challenge, you would never guess there was or is anything other than joy and happiness for her. Take time to recognize and be grateful for the all life has to offer you.

Leave A Comment, Written on May 18th, 2012 , General

 
When I decided to buy my second rental property I made sure to run all the numbers, consider many scenarios, and set up plan B, C, and D in case things went wrong. I was confident that this was a good idea, my wife, Julie, on the other hand, Tug of Warwasn’t convinced. We do that a lot, counteract the other’s enthusiasm and that’s a good thing.

What’s really funny is that at some point in this decision and others of this Swappedmagnitude, we swapped. Julie suddenly became confident that this risk was worth taking and I became very uneasy. I began to wonder if some other investment would be better and less difficult to handle. Julie laid out the reasons why the rental property was a better idea.

That’s when it occurred to me: we’re financially bipolar, swinging from mania, we can do this, to depression, this will never work, and back again. The fact that we do this on completely different schedules is funny (and really weird).

I think more people should be like this. It’s an excellent check before making a decision that could have dire consequences. If many folks, even trusted experts, had done this before buying a house they really couldn’t afford, they might not have been in as bad a situation as they were or still are.

Stop and ThinkBeing financially bipolar gives me the ability to stop myself from being impulsive, it forces me to think through a decision as I am my own skeptic and my own cheerleader. It also means that sometimes I worry about a twenty dollar purchase one minute but want to buy another rental property the next. That’s where Julie comes in to balance me.

What it comes down to is a conscious choice to consider a different perspective, something not many people seem open to doing these days.

2 Comments, Written on May 17th, 2012 , General, Money, Taking Action Tags: , , , , ,

Take OffThe imagery of success is up, climbing, reaching new heights, blasting off like a rocket. None of that can be sustained forever and we often hit a plateau in our lives, careers, our ascents to greatness. It is these moments when we can rest, regain our strength for the next struggle, the climb to the next level.

Why then does a plateau feel more like I’m stuck, like I’m not getting anywhere, maybe even falling backward? For someone like me I need constant stimulation, a What Next to work toward.

I saw a parallel to this over the weekend while on a bike ride in the area where I grew up. What makes this my favorite area are the hills. Where I normally ride there are no hills just flat roads like a perpetual plateau and for me that’s terrible.

I ride 13 miles through several towns ascending most of the way until I reach my highest point which also happens to be Bike Closeupadjacent to a mental institution (some say I’m crazy for liking the hills). At this point I turn around and cover what took me several minutes going up in just a minute or so going down, gaining momentum. Then I hit the flats, a plateau.

Another rider came along side me at a traffic light and we talked a bit and when the light changed we pedaled away. Typical of how things go on flat roads I was not able to keep up with him and watched as he got smaller and smaller as he rode farther in front of me.

The other rider reached the bottom of the next hill before me. When I got to the bottom I noticed I was gaining on him and as the road became steeper I was gaining more. I’ve always been strong on hills and I enjoy the struggle. It turns out that I like that in life too.

Do you view a plateau as boring? Do you like a challenge? When are you the most productive? Please share your thoughts with us.

2 Comments, Written on May 16th, 2012 , General, Outdoors, Success Tags: , ,

I mentioned this tragic event in a previous post and this story is an excellent illustration of the What Next attitude toward life. Julie and I were dating for six months when she got the following text on her pager “Your House is on Fire.” She wasn’t home because I had to go to work that day, Sunday, and we decided to stay at my house so Julie could drop me at the train station on her way home. What would you think if you got that message? Maybe you feel like something in your life is burning out of control?

House FireThinking it was a sick joke or a minor incident she went to check and nothing was ever the same again. The house was completely destroyed and everything in it was gone including the parrot and the dog.

How do you answer the question What Next when something so devastating occurs? The outcome of this tragedy depends on whether you ask what’s next (with the apostrophe) or what next (without the apostrophe).  Why does it matter? I’ll let a twitter friend explain it:

Mark's TweetI was excited to see that Mark understood that asking what’s next is passive, it’s wondering what will happen, it’s based in fear, dread, and confusion, it’s sitting back and waiting. Asking what next is active and exciting, it’s taking action to manage the situation, it’s based in confidence and power. What next has the ability to turn a bad situation into a good one. Julie asked what next and prevented one tragedy, the fire, from becoming another tragedy, being taken advantage of by the insurance company.

Rising from the ashes the new house.

If we could be proactive after such a devastating loss, in an emotionally fragile state, then it should be easy to be proactive when things are going well. Most people, however, take that opportunity to coast, waiting for a reason to react, putting themselves at a disadvantage when trouble arrives.

Have you, or someone you know, overcome a difficult situation and not only survived but thrived? Share you story with me in the form of a profile I would write or a guest post you would write. Contact me through the Contact Page on this blog.

To learn how to be more proactive and live with confidence in the future sign up for The What Next Trail-Map to Success.

1 Comment, Written on May 10th, 2012 , General, Success, Taking Action Tags: , , , ,

America's Talking

Collaboration benefits everyone, competition benefits the winner. Are these two concepts mutually exclusive or can they be combined to form a unique form of partnership?

In July 1994 NBC launched a new cable television channel. America’s Talking was the first job for many college graduates and my first “real” job in television. We were all excited to work there with the feeling of a start up but the backing of a major network. We were also fortunate to be working on such highly sophisticated equipment so early in our careers and we were grateful for the opportunity.

Grass Valley 300 Switcher

State of the art at the time!

Each video editor (I was one of six) wanted to prove themselves, but we also needed each other, for support and to learn from. It would have been very easy for the more advanced editors to keep their knowledge to themselves, to standout and benefit personally while the team suffered (we all know people like that, I’m sure). We chose to collaborate and shared the skills we learned. We took it a step further however by pushing each other to perform at our highest levels.

When one of us came up with a video effect, the rest of us would try to out do it, and eventually we would, so the original creator would try to improve it even more. Each day we were excited to see if our great effect had been bested. When it was, rather than feeling disappointment, we were genuinely happy for that person but set out to crush them just the same. This was a friendly competition where all involved benefited as our skills improved exponentially. I learned a new word for this phenomenon in the #PoCchat on twitter – coopetition.

PoCchat

Rather than just a bunch of young, inexperienced television editors, coopetition applies to real professionals too. When I was looking to change my career and become a financial planner I went to a couple of Financial Planning Association meetings and conventions. All of these people were competitors looking to attract clients to their firms and yet they collaborated on research papers and software and vendor evaluations, these competitors shared their best practices, the techniques that helped them to attract and retain their clients, and they did so willingly. All professional associations have this in common much like my fellow editors needed to learn from each other.

The best thing to come out of our coopetition at America’s Talking was a challenge one editor presented to the others. We had a series of 30 second spots that needed to be edited each week and they consisted of many items from multiple cameras, to music, to various effects. The goal was to pre-program all the elements so that you could edit the entire 30 second item with one push of a button. Each week we would get closer, combining some functions and automating others, until finally we had such a deep understanding of the equipment that we could  program and time all the various elements, completing the edit with one push of the red button.

Our coopetition made us all excellent editors. I have continued working with one of those editors to this day and we often look back on that time as our most productive. How can you leverage the intersection of collaboration and competition in your team?

 

SadDisappointment is temporary, success is resilient. I had to tell myself that and other things many times yesterday before they stuck, before I believed them. First I had to let the emotions that were inside out (a heavy bag helped), let them be free so I could be free.

What happened? I was passed over for a promotion I wanted, one that I, and everyone who knew me, thought I’d be perfect for. I had the support of the previous holder of that position who had moved up himself and yet when the decision was made it wasn’t me.

I write in What Next that “Your own idea of a route to a place you’ve never been is rarely accurate.” I thought I knew the way my career would progress and this job was the next logical destination. Then bam! A roadblock, a detour.

I can complain, I can be angry, I can feel rejected but none of those things change the situation. I have to not only take my own advice but live it – otherwise I’m a fraud. I have to ask What Next because what next is all I have.

I’m all for living in the moment but sometimes the moment sucks and it’s up to me to change it.

The good news is that each time I’ve asked what next before has prepared me for this moment because I have options. I have options that people who never ask what next don’t have. I have the ability to make a rash decision and quit but that’s not the what next way. The what next way stays on the current path until a new path is prepared. I may stay on the current path even after venturing onto a new path or maybe I’ll make a clean break.

After I got the news about the promotion I went for a long walk in Central Park and by the end my pace had increased from a slow lumbering walk to a confident stride and I was smiling because disappointment is temporary but success is resilient.

4 Comments, Written on May 4th, 2012 , General, Success Tags: , ,

Asking What Next is being aware – of opportunities, of your surroundings, yourself, of lessons in every day activities. I often talk about hiking and believe it’s a great metaphor for life and so is cycling. When I need to de-stress, a bike ride almost always does the trick. I call it mobile meditation. I’m not alone in that concept either as Tara points out in a recent tweetchat called #spiritchat (Sundays 9am ET hosted by Kumud Ajmani @AjmaniK).

WindWhen I’m on the bike I enjoy riding hills, the up and down is similar to our struggles through life with easy days and hard days. My least favorite aspect of a bike ride is when it’s windy. A headwind is like a perpetual hill but worse – your mind is telling you that it should be easy because the road is flat but it’s as hard as a steep hill.

There is no such thing as perpetual motion, you have to take action to keep rolling forward otherwise friction, from wind, the tires on the road, or hills, will slow you down and eventually stop your progress. This requires endurance.

Quite by accident, I kept Tara’s tweet about meditation in my favorites, but it’s a funny coincidence because she hosts a TweetChat of her own called #UBUsensations Tuesdays at 7pm ET and the most recent topic was endurance. Endurance fit so nicely with the ideas in this post I decided to include some  tweets from that chat.

Shelley defines endurance by tweeting:

Endurance Defined

When I’m on the bike riding into a head wind I appreciate the idea of endurance as I push through the difficulty and continue pumping my legs, knowing that this will eventually end or maybe turn into a tail wind. It’s what we all do with so many things in life, a job we’re unhappy with, a relationship that’s on the rocks, a new business we’ve started. Greg had an interesting take on endurance saying:

Endurance 2

Another coincidence is when Tara asked, “What similarities do you see between Entrepreneur/Leaders and Endurance Athletes?” This fit so nicely with my cycling analogy and Jennifer had a great response:

Endurance 3

Whether on a bike or in life you must keep moving to maintain momentum – there is no perpetual momentum without work. Do you have the endurance necessary? Of course you do, but you have believe it and carry on despite adversity. With a bit of patience and some stubbornness you can keep your eye on the prize and do whatever is necessary. Believe it – do it!

 

CashGathering articles on topics such as Earning, Investing, Living Frugally, and Taxes, Super Saver (who I talked about in this post) presents the Wealth Builder Carnival #75. Super knows a thing or two about building wealth since he set the goal of retiring in his 40s and accomplished it. The articles in each edition of this carnival will educate you about finances and set you on the path to building wealth. You have to take action, click over, and read the articles for any of the advice to work.

The article that Super included from me is called Functional Financial Illiteracy. There are many more excellent posts to read so what are you waiting for?

 

Leave A Comment, Written on May 2nd, 2012 , Money, Success Tags: , , , ,

I wrote a tweet to serve as a reminder of a post I wanted to write. Of course I forgot about it until a twitter friend re-tweeted it. Thanks Zane (@ZaneBradey).

Help TweetWhat’s really funny is that the very next day, Monday, another twitter friend, Bobby Umar (@raehanbobby) who moderates a tweetchat called Power of Connection (#PoCchat) chose “Asking for Help” as the topic. There are two sides to this: the first is the person asking for help and the other is the person offering to help.

Customer ServiceWe get lots of offers of help but they are often just words. When you call a customer support line, the first thing the operator says is “Can I Help You” but how many of us feel helped afterward? Some companies are great others are not.

How about you? When you offer to help are you being sincere? When the call comes, are you sorry you opened your big mouth? I’m sure we all feel that way sometimes but if you make the offer because you truly want to help, if you are genuine in your concern, then you’ll welcome the request and do all you can to assist.

The two people I mentioned here, Zane and Bobby, are examples of people who don’t wait to be asked, they help others because of their generosity and caring. I want to help you in any way I can. This blog is one way I hope to do that. Along with asking for help, however, comes an expectation that you will work as hard, or harder, than me to help yourself.

One way I think I can help you is with the What Next Trail-Map to Success. My first issue will be out soon so sign up to get your copy now. (By the way, I don’t accept and won’t have advertising on this blog or in my newsletter because that doesn’t help you. Sure I’d love to sell some of my books but that’s pretty clear from my website. You aren’t just eyes to attract advertisers, you’re someone I honestly want to help).

 

Don’t forget to sign up for The What Next Trail-Map to Success!



Retire SunsetHow do you think about retirement? Is it something that’s too far off to worry about, or too close to deal with? Is retirement something you feel ready for or scared about? Do you want to retire early or will you have to work longer than you want?

In yesterday’s post I wanted to turn the cliché “Money is the root of all evil” on its head and I came up with some suggestions such as money is the root of self-confidence, independence, and security. The fact is, money is a means to an end, it’s just a tool to use.

Retirement is thought of as an escape from work, from responsibilities, from the rat race or the grind, but retirement is none of those things if you are ill prepared without enough resources, otherwise known as money.

I know that early retirement will be a reality for me (whatever retirement means for someone who asks What Next). But what is early retirement? If 65 is “normal” retirement is 60 early? How about 55 or 50? My goal is 50 but is that really possible? And how?

The answer is yes it’s possible and I present “Super Saver” as exhibit A. Super is a blogger who retired in his 40s and, as I indicated yesterday, he didn’t use any get rich quick schemes, there were no tricks, and he doesn’t have a system he’s selling to teach you how to do it.

There are three key points to how Super retired so early and how I plan on doing the same: First, he started young and got a good education in a field with potential for good income. Not every career has the same potential for high income but you have to accept that fact if you choose to take a job because you love what you do rather than for the money. As a student you should also think twice about how much debt you’re willing to take on for a job that doesn’t pay well.

Second, he knew that hard work in the short term would lead to options in the long term, he was able to advance in his career getting raises and promotions along the way. I, too, have worked long hours and pushed hard to achieve certain goals at work but I know I won’t be doing this forever.

Third and probably most important, he was able to restrain himself and live significantly below his means. No matter how many times people hear this advice, live below your means, they simply don’t listen. Yes my wife and I have a very good income but we also save a large amount. Super says he saved 10% of his income in the early years but I don’t see how much he saved later. Julie and I save an astonishing 27.7% of our income, on average, over the last 6 years.

Wealth Builder PostsSuper wrote an excellent series of posts recounting exactly how he was able to retire in his 40s and I highly recommend reading all 10 posts.

 

So many people ask, wonder, and dream of retiring early without realizing that they have the resources to do it if only they were willing to give up some immediate pleasures for the future promise of their dreams.

It comes down to choices. Do you have what it takes to make the right choices now for a better future?

2 Comments, Written on April 25th, 2012 , General, Money, Success, Taking Action Tags: , , , ,

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A Proactive Approach to Success